so, today has been a strange day... I feel very pensive (probably because all I have done is sit around and do 4 loads of laundry and take a nap:) ). I have been sick lately, had a very wierd appetite and bored really, which could be the reason I'm sharing the events of my pensive, somewhat odd thinking from a lazy day. I normally don't like to just blog for the heck of blogging, but why not? Why not be real? So, here it is.
Today... I have thought a lot about love and marriage, money and marriage, financial stress, and how GOOD our God is. Love is such a funny thing, and I think I like it best when DC Talk said "LOVE is a VERB" (my husband would be really proud of me for that one). Love is a choice - daily, a decision to be shown and to be able to recieve and as I have thought today, I have had a broken heart and a grateful heart... thinking about a girl I didn't even know who was married a little before us and is now no longer married - heartbreak. What happened? Why? And even though its not even any of my business, I ask the Lord for comfort and healing. And, thinking about my wonderfully sweet husband who loves to play video games, dream of getting a second chance to be the high school basketball star, randomly dance and sing, eat chick-fil-a for every meal and yet does everything possible to bless and spoil me... Me a selfish, not-nice-all-the-time girl who is in desperate need of a Savior's saving. And I think, Why me? and Thank you Lord for the blessings! I have been blessed with an amazing husband who is a great listener and understand-er. All this and still LOVE is not enough... we still need our good, providing, loving, saving, redeeming God who carries us through all the financial stresses, selfish days, and wonderfully blessed days inbetween. Even when we are about to return our precious baby (the Macbook who we have affectionately named, Maci) because we need money to pay the bills, and even when I feel like some things are out of my control, well ALL things are, I am so grateful to have a Wonderful Savior, Mighty God, Almighty Provider of a God to trust and hope in. Praise be "to Him who is able to to immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glorly in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever!" Ephesians 4:20 Praise be to our good God, for HE is so good and HIS love lasts forever. I have realized that marriage is not about love, or how well and great and deeply you can love your mate, but about how deeply you can love our Lord and then out of the overflow of that, and only out of that overflow, can we love our mate.
Also, part of my thinking today, my sister-in-love, sweet Shelly was released from the hospital yesterday and will now be able to enjoy the rest of her bedresting days at home with her beautiful kids! wohoo!